I don't mean truly evil things like pedophilia or wrongful convictions; I mean those niggling, obnxious little things that chip away at your nerves bit by bit until you're a flaming maelstrom of impotent rage. You know.
5 things I find annoying:
1. the music of Michael Buble
Yesterday Glenn Beck mentioned that he and his wife shelled out $600 for Michael Buble tickets (I don't know if that was together or apiece, but either way it's obscene). He said it was worth every penny. In fact, he and Buble lavished so much mutual admiration all over each other that Richard was pretty sure they were gonna hook up after the show.
Now, Buble is cute in that square Boy Scoutish way and he has a nice voice. But why can't anyone just face the fact that he is essentially a Sinatra impersonator? He doesn't have his own sound. He doesn't have his own image. Any hipness the poor guy can muster is just the rapidly receding afterglow of the Rat Pack glinting off of his hair gel.
I love Sinatra, but no way would I put down more than $50 to see the very best Sinatra impersonator in the world (and a quick google shows there are plenty of competitors). If Sinatra was resurrected, or put in one of those little head-jars like on Futurama, then maybe I'd pay $600 to see him. Maybe. But I doubt it. I'd have to be drunk or temporarily insane or something.
2. Over-processed foods. Why do they have to contain more salt than the Dead Sea? WHY?
3. Those little plastic thingies on the end of breadbags. Why can't they just make the bread to fit the bag? Is that so hard? Thousands of years of evolution, and we don't understand how to make the bread loaves big enough to fit into a bag, or at least make the bag smaller?
4. Health food/diet fads. "Oh my god, you're not on the boiled artichoke and bratwurst diet yet? Well, don't blame me when you're dead at 30."
5. That song in the middle of Scarface. Sure, you can skip past it, but you'll still know it's there.
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