Wednesday, May 06, 2009

LoL Ew Part Deux

Please forgive me for this, but I have to elaborate on the WTF Canned Goods in my last post. Like Paul Lukas of Beer Frame fame, I just couldn't let it go - I had to know more about foods like "Pork Brains in Milk Gravy".

Here's what I found...

Pork Brains in Milk Gravy is made by Armour and Company, which despite the British/Canadian spelling was actually a Chicago company until quite recently. In fact, it was the largest slaughterhouse in Chicago around the time Upton Sinclair wrote The Jungle (and as you may know, that means their products were roughly as safe and uncontaminated as an open sewer in Chernobyl). Armour has the distinction of poisoning more soldiers than any American food company of the past three centuries. Armour also produced Dial soap with byproducts of its meatpacking business, which I guess is better than doing the Tyler Durden thing, and added a mild disinfectant to make it one of the most sanitary soaps on the market. Oh, the irony.

Who eats canned pork brains in gravy? Well, these guys do, but I don't think they enjoy it. Other than that, canned pork brains appear to be intended solely for entertainment purposes. Could have something to do with the fact that each can contains about the same amount of cholesterol as half a ton of fried jumbo shrimps battered with egg yolks and pure lard.

Canned pork brains may also function as a muse: Someone has written a pretty good poem about them.

The Armour website has a page devoted to disaster preparedness, because the folks at Armour are saavy enough to realize that people will probably not consume large quantities of their products unless every other foood source on the planet has been utterly destroyed.

3 comments:

Candy Minx said...

Yikes. I just lost my appetite. I think every time I get hungry I'll bookmark this and then I'll lose weight.

Hey how ya doing? I hope you have some good spring weather now!

Cheers!

S.M. Elliott said...

Bee-yoo-tee-ful weather, but only in fits and starts. By the end of the summer it might be spring in Edmonton...

I can't get the canned "All Day Breakfast" out of my head. *shudder*

mister anchovy said...

who knew?